worker ant

in that my ant feeling

today for the end of it,

after having that battle of mine

impossible for me to complete

of carrying this easy (little) thing

limited my power of being

none knows to say anything

El Caballo Loco II / Crazy Horse II / Le Cheval Fou II

El Caballo Loco I / Crazy Horse I / Le Cheval Fou I

Ernesto Balboa jajaja

De alguna forma tenía que divertirme este domingo... jaja

let´s raise shields and swords (Lord´s)

New responsibilities in the Lord´s mission appear to be coming upon me. As it happened before, I dont feel prepared and I am not. But as it happened before, I want to have my eyes fixed on Jesus and let him do the thing. I just want to be ready to work, fight, endure and do my atmost as if the issue of the whole strugle depended on me alone... and to have the faith to believe, knowing that the whole sturgle depends only in Him.

My faith is growing, and it is doing so together with other new skills I think the Lord is providing to me.. I want them all to be only for his glory, by the way, I am sure He is going to glorify himself in this stage.

good old times.. when she was my friend

Today I was looking at my MSN chat history. I found some old conversations with a girl that used to be my friend. I think it was a good frienship, nice chat sessions, interesting conversations..., but now we are not friends anymore.

I can say with no doubt, that this broken relationship is my fault. I didnt do the things right. In a moment it became difficult for me to behave properly, in situations that came upon our relationship.

Her decision to quit our frienship was right and wise. I was honestly not able to be a good friend for her anymore.

When people look at me, most of the time they think that I have a great ability to control my feelings and emotions. That is far from the trust, in reality the most difficult thing that I need to change in order to become a better human been and a better christian is the control of the effects that my emotions have in my behavior.

fight the ghost...

let's fight the ghost...
its easier, nicer, sometimes hard but better...
to fight a real fighter, you know: some kicks, some punches.. not a great deal..
but what about fighting a ghost, yep, a ghost
we all fight it, we all...
(what I mean)...
just following my last post (sorry its in spanish)
when waves' time is to be down,
when all of them, the darks come
and take almost everything..
they...
trying to prevent waves to return upward again
use their favorite weapon:

"to fight is useless, you will be here again"
"to fight against us, is hard and useless"
"you will be here again later, so just don't fight"

we fighters don't have an easy answer for that...
we fighters, being challenged in our worst moment...
by that ghost, the ghost of being there later again...
and ask to ourselves what to do to prevent that to happen
and simply we find difficult to get that for granted
maybe impossible to get that for granted...
we fighters hate downward waves, and to fight a ghost
just for that reason...

but there is something that yes, always, comes to happen
we wake up...

because the only way to have a chance to prevent downward waves some day.
is to wake up and make upward waves a part of our life.

Can we solve the problems confronting us?

Well the answer is an unequivocal and emphatic "Yes."

Tonight I am writing just before starting a meditation time. A time not only for praying, but for thinking, hoping, planning, and more... Tonight I am going to analyze some of the variables that come upon me and my life... Variables that I myself dont know how to handle, because life, in last days and months have been so fast... that in this moment I am starting to feel lost, I am starting to feel the future unknown.

Well, may God bless this time.

I WILL serve

commentary in: http://www.voy.com/178649/180.html

"His victory does not avoid our fight against the devil, but it gives us force to overcome him if we have faith"

" In a war it is essential to know the enemy opposing forces and to know how to overcome them".

Those were the two phrases that catched my attention and liked.

Those who look for the occultism want to obtain the things by the easy way , without fighting, without loving or having passion for the things they want and that God could grant if they strive ( anyway is He who has the last word, without caring on the experience of the wizard)…

They do not realize that neither the power nor the wealth or any other thing will bring satisfaction when they obtain them in that way (nor in this life far from it in the other), because as Saint Francisco would say: the true joy is in being able to govern ourselves, and in this case the things that cost more are those that are enjoyed more and those that is valued more… and God knows it and for that reason He blesses the fruit of work when it is requested to him of heart.

As the Bible says (not very textually), it is double the stupidity of my people: leaves me when I am a God of power an truth, and seeks those garbage gods that are nothing.

Greetings
Ernesto
remember my blog :)
http://ernestodeorozco.blogspot.com

my underlined Psalms and Proverbs

Proverbs:

(9,8) reprove a wise man, and he will love you.

(9,12) If you are wise, it is to your own advantage; and if you are arrogant, you alone shall bear it.

(10,4) The slack hand impoverishes, but the hand of the diligent enriches.

(10,5) A son who fills the granaries in summer is a credit; a son who slumbers during harvest, a disgrace

(11,21) Truly the evil man shall not go unpunished, but those who are just shall escape.

(12, 4) A worthy wife is the crown of her husband, but a disgraceful one is like rot in his bones.

(13,4) The soul of the sluggard craves in vain, but the diligent soul is amply satisfied.

My Father loves me so much... there are things that are sublime for me, this video is one of them

Team Hoyt is a father (Dick Hoyt) and son (Rick Hoyt, b. 1962) in Massachusetts who compete together in marathons, triathlons, and other athletic endeavors. Rick was disabled at birth by a loss of oxygen to his brain because his umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck, and he also suffers from cerebral palsy. Dick carries him in a special seat up front as they bike, pulls him in a special boat as they swim, and pushes him in a special wheelchair as they run.

My Father loves me so much that… beautiful, beautiful song and beautiful, beautiful video…

how much do YOU love?

is what we are going to be asked at the end of our triathlon, Jesus, He is the one carries us there, like Hyot father, He was the one who loved us at first… if you see this video , I assure to you that He did even more, He carried our wheelchair until dying, his race was even more radical, He did not save one of our dreams but our life for the eternity, somebody had to die and He chose to take that place, the one that corresponded to you, He, freely took it…

however, I do think that our video is a little different, ..... We are called to do the same to the other… (this only if you could let Him carry you)

the question is: how many wheelchairs are you interested in carrying?

take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart

Sometimes I hate those phrases like... : "it is a good thing to be (generous, humble, etc) but it is good to have limits on that.." yes, and maybe that is because I would like life to be squared, exact, mathematics-like, predictable... like me...

If my wish was true everything would be simpler, prudence would stop existing and reflection would lose much of its sense, life would like mathematics, everything would be quantity and not quality...

How to decide then, and to know the right way to act?

in Humility (to not to continue talking in abstract):

I believe that humility is very related to justice: " to give every one what is right" , but in addition justice also only can be surpassed by mercy. For example our Lord Jesus, when giving his life for us, He accepted an injustice act voluntarily, with a humble attitude " he humiliated himself until death" … he did it by mercy, compassion, love… because he knew that his self-sacrifice would bring to the human family a much greater good, He loved us without stopping loving the Father (there is some people who say to act by love but stopping loving God, I would say that is a disordered love, because the love to God is first).

but there are some "loves" that kill and humilities also, sometimes instead of to making good, our "humble" attitude (it would be advisable to call it coward) results in evils and sins, mainly of omission: when shutting up our opinion or a pertinent correction, we become accomplices of an error, sin etc. Sometimes we can fall in thinking: " I will not speak for not to try to impose my opinion, and to be thus humble" …. it is an error, if our opinion brings a greater good, we must fight for it, above all if the decision is in our hands, otherwise to do it before whom it is. There, we would show humility in the action, that is to expose our opinion being clear, firm but respectful (there are some that calls to this Assertiveness)…

ohhh how it hurts to be humble... (Martín Valverde)

Learning Blender 3D

I have about 5 days reading manuals and tutorials (well, one manual and one tutorial) of the Blender3D software. It has been boring and difficult, although obviously it would be worse for someone who does not understand 3D working and software. Well, in the same line, I am planning to learn QCAD, Planner and maybe take some 2D-Software courses (dont know which).

Those are not all my plans of course, I am working in the line of fishing my Thesis and the start of SpazioAlto Architecture... well, I need to learn a lot, study, draw, design (including a website), marketing an so on...

GYM!!

today it was my first day on gym... in the last months i have been refusing to go because I wanted to save the 200 Cordobas fee, it is about $ 10.53 dollars. However, yesterday I was meditating and concluded it is a good inversion, so that I am planning to go two months and after

that to register at the boxing school... my goal now is to gain about 12 pounds, now my weight is 130 pounds.. after I reach that weight (142 pounds) I want to learn boxing.

That is going to be the only “extra” activity in present times, I have changed my schedule so that I may finish my thesis as soon as possible.

I think I know where those ants came from!

yesterday I was watering my house´s backyard and I found something interesting. when I threw some water on that old trunk (which is older than me, I dont even remember when it came, I have pictures where I am a baby and the trunk is already there!) the ants, whose home was in the truk, began climbing the nearest tree (the nancites´one), all of them went to the tree immediately!.

the ants, which are big, strong and extrange lived in our warehouse, we discovered them some years ago, when my father was looking for I dont know what in the warehouse, the ants of course bit us and it was a very painful experience! then, when we took the box where they lived, it appears they went to the trunk.


I am amazed with the ants´reaction, it looks like if they had an "emergency plan"... its amazing.

first day on english course

today it was my fist day in the english course Juan Carlos paid for me at Corner Stone Academy. what I can see now of the academy´s style is: do it yourself approach, leadership training approach, excellence approach, things that anyone find right...

on the other hand, I am not sure of the efficacy of some methods, for example, too mucho memorization, few writing, and well, I do not know if I will have enough time to study and that way reach their standards.

priorities of the present time

My time now is being shared in a complex way between some activities and tasks. The priority number one is supposed to be my thesis … mmm well, it’s not my thesis, and it should be my relationship with the Lord… when I say “my relationship with the Lord” I am talking about the Sunday´s mass and the daily prayer time, of course it is not only those things but also all my life, because I have to do my best to do his will in everything.

Tomorrow I will have to start dealing with the new situation on the domestic affairs, because the girl was helping us with renounced yesterday; so that we are talking about: cleaning, cooking and washing clothes… then exercise, some software learning (architecture-related) and other tasks, including those of the DGI business close.

I have been practicing English and French myself, but yesterday, after a little discussion, a friend of mine paid the first level of an English course, because He is convinced it is better than the one I took in American Nicaraguan School. That course (Corner Stone Academy) is famous for its student´s development in talking skills in a fast way; well, I will try to profit this opportunity.

Priorities:

1. Relationship with the Lord
2. My family
3. My Thesis
4. Domestic Affairs
5. English and French
6. Software Learning

All glory and praise to the Lamb of God.

image: http://www.arts.ualberta.ca/~sayer/changed%20priorities.jpg

New Labels are ready

I have worked on labels, they are now ready.... and blog looks nicer!

new year comes with some changes

New year comes with totally new activities, interesting changes, and of course, learning, and sometimes learning includes some pain... however I am very happy with new things that are coming...

I am in already in Nicaragua, yesterday I have been in Managua´s Alcaldia for the continuation of my old business close (has been a large process), then I have to go to DGI for the most difficult part.

I have also been in UNI (yesterday), my university, and I had a conversation with Architect Uriel Cardoza for some advices on the start of my thesis, I talked him about the topic I want: The Design of an Architecture School... He was excited about it and I hope, Architect Pablo Medrano, which I am planning to be my tutor, love it too.

I went to "Preselección Empresarial", a jobs agency and started the process for getting inside their database.

At the end of the day I went to Ciudad de Dios´s worship assembly, I was invited to a birthday for today.

For the Blog, I am writing a very mmm... let´s say interesting article, which is about some tips on initiation in Christian Community Life, based on my own experience and others. There will be about four chapters, starting with my own story and then with general tips. I am trying to be enough open, so that this may be useful for people which call from the Lord may be different from mine. I do really love all kind of christian catholic communities and hate every kind of attacks that we are sometimes tempted to throw each other. Probably the articles will be in spanish, but I will try to translate them into english and french.

Some plans for 2008:

1. Spiritual growth.
2. Thesis.
3. Learning how to drive.
4. Girlfriend.

trip to Miami

On Sunday December 23th I am going to the United States, coming on January 11th.

I am planning taking all buses, trains and so on, so that I may know the city of Miami as well as possible (I already have a map).

I have also a lot of homework, the Architectural Design of a hotel and another one, thats why I am going with my laptop.